3. Our Motivation 


Before Starting

Click here  and print Exercise 3a and 3b "My Motivation Matters." 

Do I care more about about changing my circumstances or do I care about changing me so I am prepared to handle my circumstances.? In this lesson, we are going to learn …

When we CARE about being a positive difference maker, we are motivated to pursue our goals with determination, respect, integrity, and compassion and realign when we get self-focused.

Our GOALS are our objectives, the things we want achieve. Our MOTIVATIONS explain what we CARE about and WHY we want to achieve our GOALS.

When we THINK “our circumstances define our value”, we often remain self-focused and CARE about managing our circumstances to make us look important and feel good. As we gain understanding that our life has value and we are uniquely positioned to help Drive Positive Change, our motivation to help drive Positive Change increases.

In life, many things are out of our control.

Things go wrong. We make mistakes. When we encounter challenges, there will be things we can change and things we cannot. How we respond OUTWARDLY reflects our INWARD beliefs and attitudes. So, when things get tough, our motivation matters.

Wanting to drive Positive Change, we can choose to be motivated by things like:

  • Improving & growing

  • Reaching our full potential

  • Being a positive role model

  • Supporting others

  • Building healthy relationships

  • Creating solutions & winning together

As we use our unique circumstances to support others and create solutions to the problems around us, we experience the satisfaction that comes with being a positive contributor and gain even more motivation to improve our impact.

Choice #2

We can choose to THINK, my self-worth is a sum of what others think of me, what I have, and what I do.

Wanting our circumstances to bring us fulfillment and satisfaction, we can choose to be motivated by things like:

  • Gaining approval or popularity

  • Looking important

  • Being attractive

  • Avoiding pain, failure, or rejection

  • Getting our way

Focused on our circumstances, we get frustrated when we encounter challenges and things do not go our way; decreasing our motivation to make a positive difference.

We have a mixed narrative. Sometimes we are motivated to help drive Positive Change. Sometimes we are self-focused. For example, let’s say we are in a team competition and our goal is to win the championship.


At times, we remember our value and we are motivated to reach our full potential, support our teammates, use our successes to be a positive difference maker. So, we give our best effort.  Other times, we want to win so we can feel good about ourselves. Motivated to look important and feel good, we can make selfish choices and cause problems on our team.


So, while our MISSION describes who we want to become - what we want our story to be about - the impact we want to make … OUR CHOICES determine how our actual story unfolds. 

The Research


Making a positive difference with our attitude is good for us:

People who are grateful, optimistic, and forgiving have better experiences with their lives, more happiness, fewer strokes, and higher incomes. Forgiving others lowers the risk of heart attack; improving cholesterol levels and sleep; and reducing pain, blood pressure, and levels of anxiety, depression, and stress.

Making a positive difference with our actions is good for us:

Volunteering lowers depression

Spending money on others increases our happiness and makes our brain happier.

Helping others regulate their emotions helps us regulate our own emotions, decreases symptoms of depression, and improves our emotional well-being.


Therefore, having a mission that includes a desire to make a positive impact improves our lives.

What Do I Care About?

We have a Choice




We can THINK, “My life has value and dignity under any circumstance. My circumstances position me, but they do not define me. Therefore, I am uniquely positioned to help drive positive change.”

Let's Get Involved

Talk About It


After watching the SHOW Me video above, discuss how Ryan’s life changed when he starting to care about other helping other people and making a positive difference?

Ryan said, “Its harder to ask for help. Its harder to do the next right thing, but when you do the next right thing, good things happen for everybody.” What do you think he meant by that statement?

On Our Own

To better understand how what we care about affects our story, let us explore how our motivations influence how we pursue our goals.  Do Exercise 3a My Motivation Matters and Exercise 3b Remembering My Mission.  If you have not done so yet click here​  and print Exercise 3a and 3b "My Motivation Matters." 

In a Small Group

  1. Give each person the option of sharing what they learned from the “My Motivation Matters” Exercise?

  2. Discuss how wanting to make a positive difference can make it easier for us to realign when we get self-focused?

  3. Discuss why you think having a caring motivation important is important to maximizing out potential to drive Positive Change? 

  4. Consider how "Wanting to make a positive difference" helps us realign when we get off-track. Then give each person the option of sharing what they are willing to do to this week to improve how they 

THINK- Learn-Evaluate  CARE- Hope- Aim    ACT- Improve-Engage.

What is our Next Best Step?


Something that makes being human extraordinary is our ability to THINK CARE and ACT. Right now, wherever we are, we can choose to …


Remember our life has value  and we are uniquely positioned. Knowing our life gets better as we grow and learn new things, we evaluate our situation and make wise choices. 


Align and realign our motivations with our mission to make a positive difference.


Get involved, using our unique circumstances to help drive Positive Change by pursuing our goals with determination, respect, integrity, and compassion.

As we get involved, creating solutions

to the problems around us, we see our lives have value, and we gain motivation to be a positive contributor. While we will always have a mixed narrative, wanting to make a positive difference makes it easier to pursue our goals with determination, respect, integrity, and compassion and realign when we get self-focused.

© 2020 by HHH.